Breaking Free: Embracing Worthiness Over Achievement
/We have been conditioned to believe that we need to prove ourselves in order to be good enough or worthy.
The ways we’re taught to do this is by gathering things outside of ourselves: collecting credentials, amassing wealth, having the ideal family or home.
Gathering things and reaching milestones all the while secretly asking ourselves “is this enough”? Am I worthy and loveable yet?
But as you know it’s never enough.
Because when you’re operating within this paradigm the bar always gets raised.
There’s the next level to achieve. Or there’s pressure to maintain what you already have.
Operating within this paradigm means you can never rest for long. Especially if you don’t want to be seen as “lazy”!
You might even believe that without this motivating force to achieve - whether it’s to have a fit body or get a high paying job, then you’d do nothing (and subsequently “be” nothing).
But all we need to do is look to little children to see how they act…
Because they haven’t been conditioned yet to believe they need to prove themselves.
They haven’t been told their body needs to look a certain way to be good enough. Or that they need to achieve top grades to make their parents proud (that comes later).
Without all that burden they are full of energy, confident to follow their interests and desires. To explore life and create.
They learn what feels good for them by experience, not by someone telling them what is good or bad or right or wrong. But they’re not often given that chance.
We all have this internal compass that guides us towards what will give us enriching experiences.
But if we’ve been conditioned to believe we’re flawed in some way, or that we need to prove ourselves, we’re apt to ignore that guidance.
We’re more likely to do something that will gain someone else’s approval (rather than our own).
But when the beliefs “I’m not good enough” and “I’m not worthy” are removed… we feel good enough and worthy.
When we KNOW we’re good enough worthy, there is nothing to prove.
When there is nothing to prove, we can return to being guided by our internal desires, curiosities, and interests.
And the world becomes our oyster again.
The way that deep down, we always knew it could be.
Photo by Magda Ehlers