In about 4 months, I’m getting married.

I’m expecting a call within the next few weeks notifying me that my dress has arrived, at which time I’ll have an appointment for alterations.

I’ve been told a common question at wedding dress alterations is “how much weight are you expecting to lose?”

I have no scientific backing for this, but fatphobic talk increases 3000% during the holidays. At least it seems that way to me.

“Highlight Strategically”

“Show Your ‘Good’ Side”

“Angle Your Body”...

I could go on and on sharing the number of “tips” that a Google search will find about how to “look good” in photos, but I won’t.

Because looking good in photos isn’t what people really want, is it?

When we are born, we are comfortable in our bodies - no matter what they look like. There are exceptions of course, but for many people, the typical dissatisfaction we feel about our bodies is almost 100% learned. It’s shaped by the culture that we live in - namely, diet culture.

Speaking up and saying what is true for us can take a lot of courage - especially in the online world, and especially when our point of view isn’t popular.

Dear Fab Five,

I love you guys.

Whenever I watch the show I laugh, I cry, I try and figure out how much it would it cost to hire Bobby to redesign my apartment…

“Oh I’m being so bad!” (while eating chocolate cake).

“I’ll be good tomorrow and eat a salad” (while enjoying pizza).

Talk of being “bad” or “good” around food is so common you’ve likely heard it discussed today at lunch, or even said it (or thought it) yourself. In our culture there are different ways of eating, some deemed good and some bad - but why? Where does this moral association with food come from?

I thought I was a healthy eater. Actually, I thought I was a very healthy eater.

As a yoga practitioner and then instructor, I fell deep into the wellness well. More accurately - I dove in head first, believing that the deeper I went, the healthier I would become.

Ever since I woke up from diet culture I’ve become hyper-aware of how we talk about our bodies – especially us women. Any time I’m around a group of women who aren’t on the body acceptance or body positive path, I’m shocked at the amount of negative body talk that goes on.

Bodies change. That’s an inevitability of life.

Try as we might, it’s impossible to maintain the same body throughout our life span. Sure we can put in our best effort and probably do a good job maintaining a version of our body that we are relatively content with, but the reality is no one is immune to what life brings our way (childbirth, injury, illness), and certainly no one is immune to the effects of time.

“Oh my gosh you look amazing! Have you lost weight?!”

Have. You. Lost. Weight.

Four words in our culture that are synonymous with a compliment.

You know the feeling all too well

It begins like all the classic dieting stories (on a Monday). Every time you start a new diet or *ahem* - "lifestyle change", you are filled with optimism, motivation and determination that this time you are going to stick with it.

There was no problem, or so I thought.

Like almost everyone in our Western culture, I learned overtly through our popular information channels such as television programs, social conversations, and the pamphlets in doctors offices that being "overweight" was bad for your health, and being "obese" was much, much worse. 

I was addicted to sugar, 100%.

I took a quiz on a popular food psychologist's website to prove this to myself, and sure enough, my score was 7 out of 10 (1 being not addicted and 10 being super addicted). 7 wasn't the highest possible score, but it was high enough for me to confirm that my inability to eat just one cookie from the plate or one bowl of ice cream instead of the whole container, was the result of sugar addiction.